Brave or stupid?

It's funny how your perspective can change so quickly. A week ago I got incredibly excited every time I felt hungry- that meant I got to eat. This week I cringe when my stomach growls because I dread my next meal. Yesterday I thought a juice cleanse was a great idea. Today I want to eat a loaf of french bread- by myself- right now. This morning I thought my juice meal tasted pretty darn good. Tonight I gag when I think about liquids. Yeah, things change pretty quickly.

Rewind a bit...

My brother watched this documentary called "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead." It was about a dude who went on a juice fast for 60 days in effort to cure himself of his obesity and autoimmune disease. It worked. My brother sent us a text raving about it and now about a month later we are actually doing it. Well, attempting to do it.

The goal is a 10 day juice cleanse. We juice fresh fruits and vegetables each day for all of our meals. That's it. Just frothy juice. No chewing. (I miss chewing)

Why?

Well according to the website: "When we take in fresh fruits and vegetables in live form, because of the high enzyme and alkaline content, the body will begin to release toxins that have been lodged in the cells." Some of my family is also looking to lose weight with this cleanse but my main goal is to get rid of all the crap (no really, literally crap) that is stored in my poor lengthy intestines. If you don't already know this about me, I have a hard time pooping. I'm what you call irregular. Sometimes I get on a good schedule with my life and my bowels move pretty smoothly but the slightest change or trip or extended stay in a public place and it's like someone shoved a cork in my hind-end. I once went 9 days without a good release. Sick I know.

So that is the goal. But it isn't an easy road. The website goes on to say: "Once this happens, a cleansing response can occur, which range in headaches, dizziness, sore muscles, fatigue, nausea, low-grade fevers, runny nose or coughing, mood-swings. We are cleansed ONLY when the trapped matter LEAVES the system." Sounds like a party right? Ya know, I am not too worried about those things though. I've lived through feeling crummy many times before. I'm Catholic, I've fasted and been hungry. But I still think this is going to be the biggest test of my will and self-control that I have ever agreed to. I've given up certain things for amounts of time before. But I have always had a good substitute. When I give up sweets I have fruits to eat. When I give up meat I have, well, everything else to eat. But giving up eating and replacing it with drinking- not the best substitute.

Here's the deal. I love food. I mean I really really love food. I love the taste, taking bites, chewing, savoring, smelling and yes, talking about food. Juicing it all up and drinking it through a straw just feels like a grave injustice to the beauty that is food. Sick I know. I love food.

A few highlights...or lowlights from the start of this adventure:

On day 1 we bought our produce from a couple fruit stands and a grocery store that sells local foods. Then we went to Black Angus. I had steak, shrimp, ribs, potato skins, 3 cheese bread, fried zucchini, two kinds of salads, and molasses bread. It was amazing. (The memory haunts me)

On day 2 we actually started so for all intents and purposes this was day 1.

On the real day 1 we took the juicer out of the box and made a yummy liquid breakfast of apples, pears, carrots, and ginger. Then we made a list of all the things we were going to get accomplished during our cleanse.

Then we all promptly took large bowl movements.

We tried to substitute one addiction (food) for another (shopping). It didn't work too well because everywhere we ended up going had a grocery section to tease us.

Lunch was a mixture of pretty much every fruit and veggie under the sun. It resembled Barney in a blender. I choked it down because I was starving.

Dinner was basically Gazpacho juice. The first sip tasted pretty good. The last sip was truly muscled down.

I went to a dinner party and watched my friends eat steak and snack on crackers with fancy cheese. The highlight of the party- smelling Jake's BBQ smelling hands. Twice. YUM!

My dad called to tell us he is in the hospital again. Going to see him nearly drove my sister and brother to eat. It doesn't help that the cafeteria at Memorial hospital has always been a family favorite for their Clam Chowder, salad bar and fresh rolls.

I went out to some other friends house later in the night thinking it would be a good distraction. Little did I know the cop show we would watch starred a cop who never stopped eating delicious sandwiches. Okay, they may not have been delicious but at this point who cares!

My sweet and loving cousin also decided to eat dinner very late...chicken sausage stuffed with everything amazing including cheese. He let me smell that too though.

Mary was right, smelling food is almost like eating it. I had several large helpings of chocolate ice cream scent. Thanks Rachel.

Now it is almost 1am on real day two. I am hungry and have a headache. I also feel a little like I need to poop. Instead I am gonna go to bed and pray I don't dream about real food or have nightmares about their juices.

Stay tuned for more updates...